QUENCH THIS
Some beverages are so uncouth and cold.
i like walking, but i hate beaches.
A BAT OUT OF KRYPTON
Normal people just buy a motorcycle.
MAN OF STEELY
This might get interesting.
TOAST THE WITCH
There is probably something I should be doing right now.
FRIENDLY FIRE
Perpetuating relationships is something I need to work on.
TALK WITH YOUR MOUTH SHUT
The other day I saw a guy holding his cell phone in a strange way.
He took a bite out of it, and I felt uncomfortable. But as the guy walked closer to me I realized he was eating a croissant. I laughed at him. The guy noticed me laughing, and he became embarrassed…for no reason. Now I feel bad and wonder if my actions have ruined croissants for that guy. It was not my intention to make the guy self-croissant-conscious.
Hopefully he does not cry when the moon is half full. Also, I might have wrecked France for him.
The bad is mine.
THE TRUTH WILL MAKE YOU FREEZE
Sometimes I wonder if everyone else feels like a fraud.
BETTER THAN SWEARING
Curse alternatives are more satisfying than actual curse words.
For example, try replacing the F-word with “cupcake”. Practice in public for best results.
By the way, this cartoon is based on a true story.
Pray for David.
COMFORTABLE VOID
Sometimes I think my head would make a bowl.
PRACTICE SWING
The word “practice” is a versatile excuse.
